HomeI fought the Law but the Law Won.
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Boz1964
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I fought the Law but the Law Won.
Boz1964 Sat Feb 01, 2020 2:14 pm
I Fought the Law & the Law Won.
A second home match in a week with ‘London Calling’ once again.
How spoiled are Merthyr Town Football Fans?
Today’s ‘clash’ was against Metropolitan Police FC and was pretty much guaranteed to rock the casbah.
The morning didn’t start well, as Merthyr Manager Gavin Williams had been told that his bid to bring back Gareth Bale to Wales had failed on transfer deadline day.
After offering the Spanish side an Oddballs Bobble Cap, a Romans Sunday Lunch voucher for two, three buttons and a Dean Clarke signed shirt for the Galactico, they were told to get ‘Real’.
With the loss of the Holy Beard, Captain Marble & Old Blood n Guts, it had definitely been a dry January for cash-strapped Merthyr Town at Boracic Park, as the squad suddenly became thinner than Karen Carpenter.
Last night had also been an eventful one, with 52% of the Country celebrating Brexit and 48% not, so most of the former United Kingdom seemed to have a hangover, one way or another, and it reflected in the poor attendance.
Wales at home to Italy in the start of the Six Nations Rugby didn’t help, but I couldn’t help wondering when the extra 20,000 police fans that Boris Johnson promised from his ‘fridge’ in the election campaign would turn up.
February the 1st, brought a cold wind to blow around the Welsh Valley stadium and seeing a few of the Away side bench with bed covers on their bare legs, it was clear Veganuary was over too.
‘Pigs in Blankets’ are no longer ‘PC correct’ and therefore our Club officials had to ask the reserve players to remove the offending items before the game could kick off.
Like a diesel engined Panda Car on a cold morning, the game got off to a sluggish start.
There was very little action to write home about with the first half being more of a snore-fest and ‘boaring’ the away fans into submission.
Merthyr did an impression of a tantric Gordon Sumner, loads of penetration but unwillingly to shoot.
As the players ‘trotted’ off for their halftime ‘swill’ of tea, it was an opportunity to break open the traditional ‘Barrett’s jelly babies’ as a sweetener for the pensioners in the Webley Way Stand.
As Wales had already declared at Half-Time in the Rugby, lots of fans didn’t bother coming out for the second half , as they wanted to support a winning team for a change.
It made our half empty stadium resemble a Wuhan City centre Chinese Takeaway.
It felt like an episode of ‘Silent Witness’ and when on 53 minutes, the away side took the lead from their first proper attack, through former’ ‘Royals’ player Kai Hamilton, the scoreboard didn’t make good ‘Reading’.
It wasn’t just the limited fans that were ‘watching the detectives’.
On the hour mark, with Merthyr struggling to get any rhythm going against the Boys in Blue, the Management decided to make a bold tactical change - a defender for a ‘non-migratory winger’.
In truth, one Ben Swallow does not a Dan Summerfield make, but defensively the Martyrs didn’t look troubled at all so more firepower was needed to pierce the Metropolitan Police defence.
Up front, Ian Traylor cut a frustrated figure, as he had made so many runs behind the thin blue line but none of his teammates could seem to find him.
It was almost as if his teammates had believed he had moved on with the other players in the transfer window.
He seemed to be on a different wavelength ( as well as class) -Aberdare AM for him and the rest of his strike force on Swansea FM, as for three-quarters of the match, the Martyrs played like ‘strangers in the night exchanging glances’.
Whereas, the Metropolitan Police Line-Up didn’t need their own ‘Identity Parade’.
And it was to get worse for the Home Side, when on 73 minutes George the Frith regally poked home the second goal for the Police to send them into raptures.
Whoop, Whoop was the sound of the Police fans and Away Bench.
2-0 down and with their backs against the wall, but still being frisked, they decided to bring on veteran MC Hammer Gavin Williams to ‘stop and search’ and ‘flying squaddie’ winger Corey Jenkins.
The introduction of Pegasus made a real difference, as the young Met full back couldn’t cope with his pace, demanding that the referee ( According to the programme he was Pierluigi Collini this time ) book Corey Jenkins for doing 35 mph in a 30 zone.
All of a sudden the Police were getting caught ‘flat footed’ , as crosses from Jenkins, Swallow and Williams spread the game and causing ‘panic at the Cressida Dickso’.
Town now had the momentum and the ever dangerous Traylor broke free on the right and his cross-ball was poorly defended ( for the first time in the entire game) and found the left foot of the onrushing Tulio , to slide the ball home to cut the deficit in the last minute of normal time.
The question remained was it too little too late for the Martyrs?
Amazingly, it was not and there was a ‘Sting in the Tale for the Police’, as a tackle by a Met defender- I don’t know if it was the Police 5 Shaw Taylor, or the Lucas Ness Monster - but it resulted in Owain Jones being cut in half and the Met now
in the doo doo doo.
Referee Collina gave the offender a deathly stare but didn’t book him and then pointed to the penalty spot to the delight of the remaining home fans-
one man and his dog.
The dog was totally confused when the Referee’ Police Dog Whistle blew, as the normally reliable Ian Traylor stepped up to take the kick.
Would the Police be happy Orgreave?
The Metropolitan Assistant coach was already incensed by the first goal and uttered a stream of obscenities last heard in the EU Parliament, when Nigel Farage & Co waved their Union Jack Flags defiantly at the adults present.
Toys were thrown out of the Police perambulator and truncheons went in all directions as the nerves took over.
Things got a little heated but I requested he didn’t swear in front of the children present (my jelly babies).
When Traylor missed the kick it was my turn to issue a sworn statement.
It was the ‘long arm of the law’ in the shape of goalkeeper, Ryan who Forster ball away from goal and celebrations not seen since DCI Tennyson hooked her last
‘Prime Suspect’.
Comments were made by the dog that the goalkeeper was off his line- but he too was off his lead so they were inadmissible in court ( unlike the penalty).
Merthyr had fought the law but the law won.
But I don’t think it was the same result in the players tunnel....
Boz
A second home match in a week with ‘London Calling’ once again.
How spoiled are Merthyr Town Football Fans?
Today’s ‘clash’ was against Metropolitan Police FC and was pretty much guaranteed to rock the casbah.
The morning didn’t start well, as Merthyr Manager Gavin Williams had been told that his bid to bring back Gareth Bale to Wales had failed on transfer deadline day.
After offering the Spanish side an Oddballs Bobble Cap, a Romans Sunday Lunch voucher for two, three buttons and a Dean Clarke signed shirt for the Galactico, they were told to get ‘Real’.
With the loss of the Holy Beard, Captain Marble & Old Blood n Guts, it had definitely been a dry January for cash-strapped Merthyr Town at Boracic Park, as the squad suddenly became thinner than Karen Carpenter.
Last night had also been an eventful one, with 52% of the Country celebrating Brexit and 48% not, so most of the former United Kingdom seemed to have a hangover, one way or another, and it reflected in the poor attendance.
Wales at home to Italy in the start of the Six Nations Rugby didn’t help, but I couldn’t help wondering when the extra 20,000 police fans that Boris Johnson promised from his ‘fridge’ in the election campaign would turn up.
February the 1st, brought a cold wind to blow around the Welsh Valley stadium and seeing a few of the Away side bench with bed covers on their bare legs, it was clear Veganuary was over too.
‘Pigs in Blankets’ are no longer ‘PC correct’ and therefore our Club officials had to ask the reserve players to remove the offending items before the game could kick off.
Like a diesel engined Panda Car on a cold morning, the game got off to a sluggish start.
There was very little action to write home about with the first half being more of a snore-fest and ‘boaring’ the away fans into submission.
Merthyr did an impression of a tantric Gordon Sumner, loads of penetration but unwillingly to shoot.
As the players ‘trotted’ off for their halftime ‘swill’ of tea, it was an opportunity to break open the traditional ‘Barrett’s jelly babies’ as a sweetener for the pensioners in the Webley Way Stand.
As Wales had already declared at Half-Time in the Rugby, lots of fans didn’t bother coming out for the second half , as they wanted to support a winning team for a change.
It made our half empty stadium resemble a Wuhan City centre Chinese Takeaway.
It felt like an episode of ‘Silent Witness’ and when on 53 minutes, the away side took the lead from their first proper attack, through former’ ‘Royals’ player Kai Hamilton, the scoreboard didn’t make good ‘Reading’.
It wasn’t just the limited fans that were ‘watching the detectives’.
On the hour mark, with Merthyr struggling to get any rhythm going against the Boys in Blue, the Management decided to make a bold tactical change - a defender for a ‘non-migratory winger’.
In truth, one Ben Swallow does not a Dan Summerfield make, but defensively the Martyrs didn’t look troubled at all so more firepower was needed to pierce the Metropolitan Police defence.
Up front, Ian Traylor cut a frustrated figure, as he had made so many runs behind the thin blue line but none of his teammates could seem to find him.
It was almost as if his teammates had believed he had moved on with the other players in the transfer window.
He seemed to be on a different wavelength ( as well as class) -Aberdare AM for him and the rest of his strike force on Swansea FM, as for three-quarters of the match, the Martyrs played like ‘strangers in the night exchanging glances’.
Whereas, the Metropolitan Police Line-Up didn’t need their own ‘Identity Parade’.
And it was to get worse for the Home Side, when on 73 minutes George the Frith regally poked home the second goal for the Police to send them into raptures.
Whoop, Whoop was the sound of the Police fans and Away Bench.
2-0 down and with their backs against the wall, but still being frisked, they decided to bring on veteran MC Hammer Gavin Williams to ‘stop and search’ and ‘flying squaddie’ winger Corey Jenkins.
The introduction of Pegasus made a real difference, as the young Met full back couldn’t cope with his pace, demanding that the referee ( According to the programme he was Pierluigi Collini this time ) book Corey Jenkins for doing 35 mph in a 30 zone.
All of a sudden the Police were getting caught ‘flat footed’ , as crosses from Jenkins, Swallow and Williams spread the game and causing ‘panic at the Cressida Dickso’.
Town now had the momentum and the ever dangerous Traylor broke free on the right and his cross-ball was poorly defended ( for the first time in the entire game) and found the left foot of the onrushing Tulio , to slide the ball home to cut the deficit in the last minute of normal time.
The question remained was it too little too late for the Martyrs?
Amazingly, it was not and there was a ‘Sting in the Tale for the Police’, as a tackle by a Met defender- I don’t know if it was the Police 5 Shaw Taylor, or the Lucas Ness Monster - but it resulted in Owain Jones being cut in half and the Met now
in the doo doo doo.
Referee Collina gave the offender a deathly stare but didn’t book him and then pointed to the penalty spot to the delight of the remaining home fans-
one man and his dog.
The dog was totally confused when the Referee’ Police Dog Whistle blew, as the normally reliable Ian Traylor stepped up to take the kick.
Would the Police be happy Orgreave?
The Metropolitan Assistant coach was already incensed by the first goal and uttered a stream of obscenities last heard in the EU Parliament, when Nigel Farage & Co waved their Union Jack Flags defiantly at the adults present.
Toys were thrown out of the Police perambulator and truncheons went in all directions as the nerves took over.
Things got a little heated but I requested he didn’t swear in front of the children present (my jelly babies).
When Traylor missed the kick it was my turn to issue a sworn statement.
It was the ‘long arm of the law’ in the shape of goalkeeper, Ryan who Forster ball away from goal and celebrations not seen since DCI Tennyson hooked her last
‘Prime Suspect’.
Comments were made by the dog that the goalkeeper was off his line- but he too was off his lead so they were inadmissible in court ( unlike the penalty).
Merthyr had fought the law but the law won.
But I don’t think it was the same result in the players tunnel....
Boz
Last edited by Boz1964 on Tue Feb 04, 2020 11:33 am; edited 2 times in total (Reason for editing : Police Brutality)
Boz1964- Posts : 2404
Join date : 2012-10-08
The Charge of the Light Brigade
Boz1964 Sun Feb 02, 2020 2:30 am
I have just seen the video on twitter of the penalty and was surprised how far the keeper was off his line......Boz
Boz1964- Posts : 2404
Join date : 2012-10-08
Re: I fought the Law but the Law Won.
WSCEvans Sun Feb 02, 2020 3:24 am
Boz1964 wrote:I have just seen the video on twitter of the penalty and was surprised how far the keeper was off his line......Boz
To say he encrouched would be an understatement metres off his line.
WSCEvans- Posts : 501
Join date : 2013-02-26
Location : Deepest Gwent
I fought the Law and the Law was misapplied.
Boz1964 Sun Feb 02, 2020 4:09 am
The Law Changes in the programme state:
The goalkeeper must have one of his feet partly on the goal line ( or above it when jumping) when the kick is taken.
Seems like the title of the new comedy title was more relevant than first thought.
Either that or their keeper has a secret third leg.
Boz
The goalkeeper must have one of his feet partly on the goal line ( or above it when jumping) when the kick is taken.
Seems like the title of the new comedy title was more relevant than first thought.
Either that or their keeper has a secret third leg.
Boz
Boz1964- Posts : 2404
Join date : 2012-10-08
Re: I fought the Law but the Law Won.
OWNES1 Sun Feb 02, 2020 4:26 am
Some overtime worked on the non pc related puns. Some I haven't heard of.
OWNES1- Posts : 229
Join date : 2013-04-02
Age : 62
Location : MERTHYR TYDFIL
We’ve been framed
Boz1964 Sun Feb 02, 2020 7:11 am
Ownes, have you seen the video of the missed penalty?
An absolute classic.
The rereee and linesman had clear sight of it too.
Hysterical.
Boz
An absolute classic.
The rereee and linesman had clear sight of it too.
Hysterical.
Boz
Boz1964- Posts : 2404
Join date : 2012-10-08
Re: I fought the Law but the Law Won.
Nubs Sun Feb 02, 2020 3:36 pm
Boz1964 wrote:I have just seen the video on twitter of the penalty and was surprised how far the keeper was off his line......Boz
Could you put a link up for me please. I can't find it. TIA.
Nubs- Posts : 1346
Join date : 2013-05-06
Age : 62
Location : Fleur-de-Lys
Video Nasty
Boz1964 Mon Feb 03, 2020 12:56 am
Sorry Nubs,
I don’t know how to copy it from Twitter.
It was posted by someone called Scoot ( Blue Army).
Boz
I don’t know how to copy it from Twitter.
It was posted by someone called Scoot ( Blue Army).
Boz
Boz1964- Posts : 2404
Join date : 2012-10-08
Nubs- Posts : 1346
Join date : 2013-05-06
Age : 62
Location : Fleur-de-Lys
Line of Duty?
Boz1964 Mon Feb 03, 2020 11:13 am
Well Nubs,
Having seen the video do you think he was :
A) off his line a tad
B) off his head
C off duty
D) All of the above?
Answer on a postcard to Referee Samuel ‘Collina’ Fudge
c/o Opticians Department,
Blind Eye Way,
Biasingstoke
Lloegr
SH1 1TE
Having seen the video do you think he was :
A) off his line a tad
B) off his head
C off duty
D) All of the above?
Answer on a postcard to Referee Samuel ‘Collina’ Fudge
c/o Opticians Department,
Blind Eye Way,
Biasingstoke
Lloegr
SH1 1TE
Boz1964- Posts : 2404
Join date : 2012-10-08
I FOUGHT THE LAW..
Tim Drummond Tue Feb 04, 2020 7:19 am
I always preferred the BOBBY FULLER version to that of THE CRICKETS
I did see JOE STRUMMER AND THE MESCERALOS perform it at THE FLEADH in FINSBURY PARK in 2002 when their version was more akin to THE CRICKETS.
I did see JOE STRUMMER AND THE MESCERALOS perform it at THE FLEADH in FINSBURY PARK in 2002 when their version was more akin to THE CRICKETS.
Tim Drummond- Posts : 3133
Join date : 2011-07-31
I FOUGHT THE LAW..
hirwaunman Tue Feb 04, 2020 9:23 am
The Oysterband did a good version, but the Jolly Boys one is best of all.
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