The Last Tango in Powys

The Last Tango in Powys

Having missed last night’s Senior match against Penybont in error, I just knew I had to get my Merthyr Town FC Football ‘fix’ somehow this weekend.

Fortunately, the Martyrs ‘Fame’ Academy were due to visit Brecon Corinthians today and a chance to watch Corrie Live was just up my street.

It was also a chance to see one of Merthyr’s favourite ‘sons’, Paul Keddle, in action for his home town Club.

Watching our top defender playing in the FA Cup against League Team Walsall live at Penydarren Park, with the match being being beamed via satellite into the homes of millions was probably the pinnacle of my Merthyr footballing experience( bar the Atalanta Game obviously).

And if the most expensive defender in the World Harry Maguire is worth £80 Million today....how much would Paul Keddle have brought at his prime in 2005?

Still playing 14 years later for Brecon Corries but this time as striker, he had rejoined his goalkeeping brother, Russell Hobbs, to form a deadly duo at both ends of the pitch.

And it was the Brothers Kedward, who were responsible for this comeback victory over a visiting Merthyr Town team playing the final instalment of their tough pre-season tour of local Valley Clubs.

The purpose of which is the ‘drum’ up support ( think about it Ownes) and identify any local talent capable of becoming the next Paul Keddle, potentially putting them onto a bigger satellite stage  ( Is ‘Sky the Limit?).

With ex-Hammer Gavin Williams at the managerial helm of the Martyrs, who knows how much more local players can improve and benefit from his level of experience and quality standard.

However today, it was a good job that nobody from Powys Trading Standards was present at the inappropriately named Rich Field, as the area looked anything but rich, as the Club stand and pitch looked more in need of a makeover than
Euro-‘Septic’ MP Ann Widdicombe.

Whilst Premiership Football clubs can pay millions for players, real grassroots football clubs based on true Greek sporting ethos and principles just like Brecon ‘Corinthians’, are forgotten by the Footballing Elite and have to rely on the generosity and support of the local volunteer community to survive.

Sport has been ruined by money.

But fortunately, non-league football is the last bastion of sporting prowess and philanthropy.

A chance for local lads to put themselves in the ‘shop window’ and get spotted by a visiting scout or two.

Now pre-season is a difficult time for Managers to play ‘friendlier matches’, as whilst they can blood the younger untried players, they also risk the blood of their seniors as an injury to key players can devastate a league team’s season prospects before a ball is even kicked.

The case in point today being an injury to the ever reliable Kerry Morgan.

After putting his body on the line by creating a tap -in for whirling dervish, Camden Duncan, he was flattened with a technical knockout that local Brecon wrestler, Adrian Street (Kid Tarzan) would have been proud of.

His bloody nose ending up the same colour as the purple away shirt he was already wearing.

Before this collision, there was only one man running the real Brecon Show today after scoring a 4th minute penalty, setting up for the second for Dervish and trying to emulate Real Zaragoza’s Nayim and former ‘Blue’ John Holmes by lobbing Seaman from the halfway line.

The shot that thumped back from the Corrie bar ( The Rovers Return?) was the highlight of a game played on a pitch that was harder than the Russian Steppes and had more bumps than an Octagenarian birthday party.

Talk about the Boris bounce.

One of the older footballing community, asked if the present pitch still had rabbit holes on its playing surface?

But whilst the ‘Fiver’ that my Wife & I gave to watch the game will help the struggling Club with its war on want ( Warren no want?) after little support from the FA ‘Bigwigs’, it was certainly no Watership Down,  if you Usk me.

Better suited to the underfoot conditions the much more ‘Liberal’ Brecon and Radnorites set to work in putting our inexperienced back line on the ‘unlucky’
back foot.

On the half hour mark, a bounce, last seen in the film ‘Space Jam’, deceived centre half McDonnell and left both Merthyr and the underground movement below exposed and as the referee pointed to the spot ,up popped the furry head of Bugs Bunny to try and discover why the tenant upstairs was being so noisy.

Without splitting any hares, the penalty was dispatched by Dale Evans on the half hour mark to level the score -if not the pitch.

And things were to get worse for the Away Team , as inside three chaotic minutes Merthyr went into myxomatosis mode, allowing the diminutive Brecon strikers to out leap their counterparts ( Purple Men can’t jump?) and take a deserved lead.

It came from Keddle, who at the ripe old age of 67 still shows no signs of running out of ‘steam’.

But Merthyr weren’t finished with this see-saw game yet.

Kerry Morgan’s nose did most of the running setting up the equaliser for Camdon  Duncan.

A run down the right flank by the young Merthyr back, who shares a barber with Oliver Cromwell and a perfect pass from Craig Reddy from the edge of the area  gave Morgan a Reddy- Made chance to neatly lob over the Home Goalie and put the makeshift Martyrs back into the ascendancy, just before the whistle sounded for the
halftime Keddle.

With the interval score 3-2 to the Evostik League Boys- you would have thought the local farmers would have awarded Kerry Morgan ‘best in show’ for being ‘outstanding in his field’ ( or even theirs perhaps?) but unlike UKIP, the Corries’ omnibus wasn’t finished just yet.

The Brecon Boys emerged from the 73 year old Joanna Lumley Gurkha Stand (with Kukris drawn ) and were ‘absolutely fabulous’.

Seven minutes later they were level after another bout of bloody assizes saw Judge Jeffries goal hanging and poking the ball home for the leveller.

And 4 minutes later they were a head, as Joel Evans became ‘Evans above’ and put the Corries in the lead once more.

SuperGav shuffled his pack and brought on the long legged Super Mario into the match.

Keddle & Co now knew that they were in a ‘Game Boy’.

Playing at Centre Back, he spent a longer time running on Corrie than Ken Baldwin.

And apparently his brother Luigi is even better.

As he went,  Super Mario leapt defenders legs, barrels, mushrooms and unlucky rabbit heads, as he danced his way forward towards the Home Goal.

But he was on ‘burrowed’ time, as he was finally taken out by the giant figure of Harvey near the penalty area but neither the referee, linesmen or crowd- except me and actor James Stewart saw him do it.

The game finished 4-3 after a valiant rearguard action from the Brecon Boys played in the true Corinthian spirit.

It was great to see the evergreen Keddle still performing at a high level despite his terrible leg break a few seasons ago.

But there was one negative that threatened to spoil the day.

The Richfield wasn’t just the home to the stinging tackles of the reds of Brecon Corinthians.

There was also another team in black n yellow present who were equally as busy.

I am talking about the presence of more W.A.S.P’S than an abandoned UKIP bus in a lay-by on the A470.

The Rottweilers of the insect world wouldn’t leave me and my final can of orange pop alone for one minute.

I don’t like to harm creatures if I can avoid it but I had to get a swat on at the Watton, as I wanted to keep the Last Tango in Powys to myself.

Like Brecon Corries before them -they were to lead this Merthyr man a merry dance all afternoon.

Boz

Thanks to Richard Adams for the report.
Sorry I was unable to see the game and catch up with Paul Keddle, who was a great servant to The Martyrs. But I was on the way back from Ireland where there were wasps too, with one of the party stung in Cahir - very painful!